Control freak.

Do you ever feel like its never enough?  I run this household.  I do the shopping, plan the meals, bathe the children, take care of the pets, make the doctors appointments, pay the bills, clip the coupons, clean the house and go to work.  I make sure we always have what we need in the house, shop for birthday presents, rsvp to parties, make plans, and did I mention go to work? 

Not that Jason doesn’t help, because lord knows he does.  He helps a lot.  There are just some things he’s not wired to do.  If I send him to the grocery store, he comes back with twinkies.  If I send him to the mall to buy a present, he comes back with slippers and a robe.  (This holds true for anyone, me, the kids, mother, father, baby showers, and retirement presents). 

When he has refilled prescriptions or made doctors appointments, he has gotten confused by the lingo, and ends up calling me anyway.  Same thing applies to the pets.  We have four cats and a dog.   As any pet owner knows, preventive maintenance is the key to healthy pets.  To this day, Jason has no idea that our dog gets heartworm medicine every month.  He has no idea what type of food our food allergic cat eats and couldn’t tell you what type of flea medicine we use.

I realize I created this monster.  I realize that I may be a bit of a control freak and have to have my hands in everything. I realize that he was a fully functioning adult when I met him.  And somehow, I killed that in him.  He doesn’t even know where I buy his underwear.  I’m pretty sure he doesn’t realize that I buy him new underwear.  He thinks it just appears in his drawer.

He takes care of our children and does a damn good job at it.  I really can’t complain.  He is a wonderful father and an amazing husband.  He works hard to provide for our family and will help anyone in need.  I know I’m lucky.  I just feel overwhelmed sometimes.  At the end of the day, only half the list got done.  I feel like I need another five hours in the day to accomplish what I need to get done.

Am I the only one that has done this to her husband?  Am I the only one that puts this much stress on myself?  How do I fix it now?  Should I even try? 

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The last time we were out of the house sans kids together….sad.  it was July 7th.

Laura….

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8 thoughts on “Control freak.

  1. Laura- Learn to live with it. You will be better off than trying to change it. Just make sure you and Jason do something good and fun more often for yourselves! Lets face it. Women are the best jugglers. It’s just how we’re wired. We are so used to having babies on our hips while we cook, clean, make appointments, run errands and damn we don’t even get bathroom time to ourselves. That’s what we get for being such good multi-taskers!

  2. Write a list of common stuff that you do in a day, week, month etc. Have Jason sit down with you and discuss. Although you are very happy with your life and you love Jason very much, you feel that you are getting overwhelmed with what you have piled on to yourself.
    It would really help you out if Jason took on some of the responsibility of the house.

    When you do discuss, be careful not to use the YOU word. Your not blaming Jason, and be careful not to blame yourself either. This isn’t about blame, it’s about shifting and working towards something. Both of you can go through the list and Jason can pick things that he would like to have sole responsibility for. Whether it be, the shopping (including bills and couponing), pets (all of ’em), etc.

    The first month or so will be Jason learning everything that you have ingrained in your being, so that will call for some extra patience, but nothing is unlearnable! Jason is a smart dude, he will get it and that’s going to look great on that to do list.

      1. Of course not, that’s why talking about it is important. If he wasn’t doing anything I’m sure the blog would have had some choice words run through it 🙂

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