10 lies I tell my toddlers

10 lies I told my toddlers.

1. The kitchen went to sleep.

Sounds strange but they accept this as a valid reason not to go in there.

2. The truck/car/train ran away.

I use this when I can’t find said toy.  Sadly, they stare longingly out the window, waiting for it’s return.

3. The kitty is sleeping.

Actually the kitty is hiding in fear for his life.

4. The doctor is fun.  We are going to play lots of fun games.

We both know the doctor doesn’t ever equal fun.  Especially shot visits.

5. Mickey mouse went on vacation to Florida, so he’s not at his clubhouse.

There is only so much of that mouse’s voice I can stomach before I want to throw the t.v. out the window.

6. The basement is scary, you don’t ever want to go down there.

This really isn’t a lie.  I wish my washer and dryer weren’t down there. 

7. No, we can’t watch trucks on mommy’s phone.  Mommy is working.

Mommy is Facebooking and playing solitare.

8. You are doing an awesome job cleaning up.

No your not.  You are actually making more work for me later.  But I applaud your effort. Sorta.

9. If you are good in the store, mommy will buy you a lollipop.

No I won’t.  I will distract you with something shiny until we are in the car.

10. You are a good boy.

Sometimes you are.  Most times you are two year old Monsters little boys.  I love you but you are slowly driving mommy and daddy insane.

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